Twas the night before a UFC Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.
The shin guards were hung by the cage with care,
In hopes that St Pierre soon would be there.
The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of submissions danced in their heads.
And with mamma in my guard, and my ankles locked tight,
We’d just gone to the ground in a good long fight.
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the guard to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the luster of spotlights to objects below.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
Strutting to his fight it was George St. Pierre.
With a little old doctor, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it was me he would pick.
More rapid than eagles his strikes they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name!
“Now jab! now, cross! now, left hook and a teep!
On, the ground! On, the back! on, the choke and now you’re asleep !
To the top of the cage! a back flip for all!
Now tap away! Tap away! Tap away all!”
As ripped tickets that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky.
So up to the arena-roof the coursers they flew,
With a champion belt and a Rogan interview.
And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the phone
The prancing and pawing… the UFC does he own.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney Dana White came with a bound.
He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
Like big Snoop dog , tarnished with ashes and soot.
A bundle of cash he had flung on his back,
And with him a ring girl, with a real nice… round card
The lights how they twinkled! Look cameras how merry!
St Pierre was a coach, it was White’s show how scary!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
yelling at the fighters it was White but not snow.
The strap of a glove he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke from his ears encircled his head like a wreath.
He had a broad face and a little round belly,
That shook when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly!
He wore Tap Out and Affliction, a right jolly UFC elf,
And I bowed when I saw him, in spite of myself!
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know I had another fight to dread.
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
dividing us in teams, and housing us with a jerk.
And bumping his fist aside of his heart,
And giving a nod, to single the training to start!
He sprang to the cage, “time for the fights he sang,”
I raised up my guard and heard the bell as it rang.
But I heard him exclaim, as I fought like a knight,
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a UFC-fight!”
Just a little fun before the holidays… I hope you all enjoyed it. Merry Christmas from the dojo!